EWTN Catholic Q&A
RE: Sickness, Illness and caregiver
Question from Janis on 08-28-2013:

This is in reference to the question from Gilbert T. Trevino on 8/12/2013: I understand the caregiving part and the frustration that is ensnared in the role of the caregiver, as I care for my mom, who has Alzheimer's. She has good days, and not-so-good days. I find it hard to not "lose it" and have found myself joining my brother in drinking as of late. I have never really been a drinker before.

According to the advice given by you, Ms. Brown, is to find respite care. I have tried that and every place I've tried wants a deposit of money I cannot afford. I take my mom to work with me. Fortunately, they allow this. But, as she is with me 24/7, I feel I am in a place where I become depressed very often. I do love her, I just cannot be "on duty" 24/7. It wears on your mental and physical health very heavily. At the same time, I feel tremendous guilt for even having frustratioin over taking care of her, because of the fact that she took care of all 7 of us while we were growing up.

In short, I commensurate with Mr. Trevino and I am sure others can relate to us, as more of us are caring for our parents and others these days.

Thanks and God bless, Janis

Answer by Judie Brown on 09-23-2013:


You are a very special caregiver for your dear mother, and at the same time you have realized that it is an all consuming effort that tires you in many ways. Respite care is one way to go, of course, but you might also want to consult with Catholic Charities or even your pastor to find out if there is a network in your community of those who would relieve you if only for a few hours. Most of the places where this is done, there is no charge.

See what you can find. I will be praying for you.

Judie Brown