O LITTLE TOWN OF SANDY HOOK…FOREVER CHANGEDFriday, at the end of a full day of appointments and deadlines, including writing “Joan’s Rome,” I finally turned on the TV only to discover the shocking, horrifying, unspeakable, unfathomable massacre at Sandy Hook school in Newtown! I had seen a few quick headlines on the Internet as I was writing, but they referred to the early stages of the killings and said nothing about the extent or brutality of the crime.
I have been following events almost every waking hour since then, trying and failing – like everyone else! - to understand what could cause one person to snuff out innocent lives – 20 children just out of babyhood – with such extraordinary brutality.
Why and how did one person go so dreadfully wrong? Why and how have we as a nation changed so much that schools today have to almost live in a lockdown state, have secuity cameras trained on public areas, have to hire security guards and check students for weapons, etc. And yet that is not enough!
In an earlier life, I was a French teacher for five years – but in a very different America. I loved teaching with a passion – the great students I had in high school, their magnificent curiosity, their energy and enthusiasm and optimism. I went home at the end of each long day a tired teacher but a happy person who had been uplifted by her students, hoping I had done the same for them.
One thing for sure - I certainly never feared for my life. When we had drills at school, they were only fire drills. I’d have to check the news for those years on the Internet but I don’t remember massive killings taking place with ever great frequency and victims being killed by military-style weapons.
I knew the first day I was in the classroom that I’d be teaching more than French. For the first four years I taught in a Catholic girls’ school and was one of only several lay teachers. I knew that, in addition to teaching French, I would be imparting a lot of life’s lessons, lessons that would last well beyond the students’ ability to count to ten in French.
Those were wonderful, happy, fulfilling years for me.
Today my niece Susan is an elementary school teacher in California. She lives and teaches in a different world, and her school is very different from the one I taught at, in a thousand ways, large and small, because our society, our culture is so different, so changed.
Susan has two sons, two of my 18 great-nieces and nephews. She and all those wonderful, beautiful, bubbly, loving children were the first images to pop into my mind when I heard the news Friday.
I cannot fathom losing one of them, especially to such unthinkable brutality.
In a small way, my loving heart of an aunt 9 times over, and a great aunt 18 times over, has a hole in it, and grieves with all Americans. I dare not say my heart empathizes with the Newtown families – that is simply not possible.
I want to share two stories with you now. The first is from a friend whose daughter lives in Sandy Hook: we became penpals years ago through my blog and became friends when she and her husband came to Rome and we finally met. I have changed the names in the email.
The second is an astonishing poem I received from a nun I know here in Rome. It has been circulating for two days on the Internet and via emails and is remarkable in its heartfelt description of the Sandy Hook tragedy, and the deep faith shown.
“Joan, dear Joan,
“Sandy Hook is where our daughter and her family have lived for 20 years. It is only a teeny corner of larger Newtown.
“Sandy Hook Elementary was the best of all the schools that our grandchildren have been in.
“Our granddaughter Debby loved Sandy Hook Elementary especially...she is in Middle School now...Only 2 years ago we were in Sandy Hook over a month helping their mother Mary...and picked up and dropped off Debby every day at school...A MOST Secure school...even for us grandparents, we were NEVER just "checked in "lightly"...had to show our ID's every time. At the same time, the kindest people in the front office who seemed to know every single child by name.
“And the parents are alert. One morning Bob (NB: the grandfather) arrived too early with Debby...and so he parked a little to the side of the front entrance, but had the motor running with the heat on because it was chilly....Debby was still sleepy ... and in the back seat, accompanied by a huge stuffed doggy...and covered herself with a blanket. The next thing Bob knew, the office monitor was tapping on his window...telling him a parent had called in an alert..."There is an old man sitting outside the front door in a Michigan car….AND the motor is running AND there is a child in the back seat COVERED with a blanket ..This may be a kidnapping!!!"
“(Grandson’s name) is in the Newtown High School. Both children were in lockdown all day.
“All so horrific!
“Dear Holy Father even sent a message to the town.”
And now, here is the poem circulating on the Internet, ascribed to Cameo Smith of Mt. Wolf, Pa.:
Twas’ 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38 am
when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven’s gate.
their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air.
they could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there.
they were filled with such joy, they didn’t know what to say.
they remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that day.
“where are we?” asked a little girl, as quiet as a mouse.
“this is heaven.” declared a small boy. “we’re spending Christmas at God’s house.”
when what to their wondering eyes did appear,
but Jesus, their savior, the children gathered near.
He looked at them and smiled, and they smiled just the same.
then He opened His arms and He called them by name.
and in that moment was joy, that only heaven can bring
those children all flew into the arms of their King
and as they lingered in the warmth of His embrace,
one small girl turned and looked at Jesus’ face.
and as if He could read all the questions she had
He gently whispered to her, “I’ll take care of mom and dad,”
then He looked down on earth, the world far below
He saw all of the hurt, the sorrow, and woe
then He closed His eyes and He outstretched His hand,
“Let My power and presence re-enter this land!”
“may this country be delivered from the hands of fools”
“I’m taking back my nation. I’m taking back my schools!”
then He and the children stood up without a sound.
“come now my children, let me show you around.”
excitement filled the space, some skipped and some ran.
all displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can.
and I heard Him proclaim as He walked out of sight,
“in the midst of this darkness, I AM STILL THE LIGHT”
"The Holy Father was promptly informed of the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown and he has asked me to convey his heartfelt grief and the assurance of this closeness in prayer to the victims and their families, and to all affected by the shocking event. In the aftermath of this senseless tragedy he asks God, our Father, to console all those who mourn and to sustain the entire community with the spiritual strength that triumphs over violence by the power of forgiveness, hope and reconciling love."
Sunday at the Angelus, Benedict XVI prayed for the victims of Friday’s school massacre, speaking in English to the faithful in St. Peter’s Square.
“I greet all the English-speaking pilgrims and visitors present at today’s Angelus. I was deeply saddened by Friday’s senseless violence in Newtown, Connecticut. I assure the families of the victims, especially those who lost a child, of my closeness in prayer. May the God of consolation touch their hearts and ease their pain. During this Advent Season, let us dedicate ourselves more fervently to prayer and to acts of peace. Upon those affected by this tragedy, and upon each of you, I invoke God’s abundant blessings.”
He then urged the faithful everywhere to renew their prayer and action in favor of the cause of peace.
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